September

Ah, September. The beginning of the end of the year. And I'm nowhere near where I wanted to be financially. At the very least, our debt is lower than when we started. Thank goodness.
I am feeling so down today. Billy is finally starting to feel the full weight of everything he's taken on and it's really starting to show. I was doing fine until he started talking about how bad he feels and how work and school and everything is suffering because of it. I pep talked him as best as possible but now I feel sad too. Then we went to the store and he bought new work clothes with some of the money he made selling stuff on eBay. He's hoping it will boost his confidence level. I hope so too. While we were at the store, I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror and I looked god awful. Just run down and so not like myself. It was horrible! I feel so much older than I am. I find myself pining for the days when everything was simple. Nothing is simple anymore. I also had a dream last night about Missy. I'm still not over last year's falling out. I so very much so miss the girl that used to be my friend. Not the girl that stopped talking to us last year but the girl she was before. Before she got involved with and married a jerk. A jerk that pretended to be our friend for so long when he talked crap about us behind our backs. I miss her. ;_;
Right now I'm feeling isolated and lost. I so very much just want to pack a suitcase and go on a vacation but we can't afford it. In the past, we always went on vacation in September, right around our anniversary. I really want to get out of here. I always loved my goofy little hometown cuz it was easy and comfortable and pretty much anywhere we went on vacation felt like an exotic getaway in comparison. Now that we have zero travel dollars and don't go anywhere anymore, I get annoyed with being here all the time. Blah.
Dear Lord, please give us some reprieve.